The strange obsession with having the right ‘kit’

Have you got what it takes to go 'wild swimming'? No, not so much the hardiness or the love of sinking your feet into the boggy bottom of a lake or feeling something brush against your ankle that could be a fish, a plant or something more sinister. Have you got the right kit?

Outdoor swimming - or open-water swimming, wild swimming, 'in-my-day-we-just-called-it-swimming', whatever you want to call it - is enjoying a swell in popularity, and alongside what is supposed to be a simple pursuit is a growing obsession with having the latest equipment. It's not just wetsuits - which a lot of purists eschew on the grounds that you don't get the same sensation of being in the wild water when insulated by neoprene - the kit list goes far beyond that. 

On the outdoor swimming groups that I'm a member of, I've spotted a number of people posting that they 'want to go swimming, but I haven't bought a DryRobe yet - is that ok?' DryRobes, for the vanishingly small number of people who haven't seen someone waddling along wearing one, looking like an enormous human Christmas tree, are enormous, thick, fleece-lined coats which allow you to change underneath them while drying off at the same time. 

Then there's tow-floats, GoPros, phone diving cases, gloves, booties, hats, rash vests, hot water bottles, thermos flasks, changing tents and even your own personal natural swimming pond - if you've got a large garden and tens of thousands of pounds to spare for someone to construct a fake 'wild' spot.

No wonder some non-swimmers are looking at this sport and wondering if it's more about showing off how much money you have than it is about simply enjoying time in nature. The obsession with kit is easy to mock. Hell, I'm easy to mock because I own a lot of the kit I've listed above (sadly the tent kept blowing away and my son's paddling pool isn't quite the same as a natural swimming pond). One woman who I swim with regularly mocks me as being 'like a dad' because I love turning up with something new that's going to make my swim even more fun. She has been swimming through icy winters for far longer than me in just a bikini and one of those multi-coloured beach towels that linger in our airing cupboards as memories of childhood holidays.

Kit is also a bit of a menace that afflicts many other sports than just swimming. A couple of decades ago, running was the sort of thing that you had to have the right sort of body, the right kit, and the right jargon in order to do. Running shops only seemed to cater for stringy men who already knew if they overpronated or underpronated, or if they'd had issues with the ITB before. Running kit was technical, running clubs elite. All that's changed in recent times, thanks in no small part to Parkrun, which has encouraged people to turn up at 9am in their local park and walk, jog or run 5k in whatever time they can manage, wearing whatever they want. It started off as a rather middle-class affair, but deliberately expanded into more disadvantaged areas so that everyone could enjoy the physical and mental health benefits of running, not just those with sharp elbows and fast feet. Some Parkruns organise clothing and shoe collections so that people on low incomes can still run comfortably.

Now, to be a runner is merely to go running, not to own a special pair of £70 technical tights. It's also so ordinary, so unremarkable, to be a runner that people don't feel the need to go on about it any more (or at least they shouldn’t). In time, the same thing will, I hope, happen with outdoor swimming. It already is in reality, rather than on social media, which makes every activity seem far more daunting and far more subject to uniforms and rules than is really the case. Most regular outdoor swimmers are relaxed folk who have a couple of (slightly dog-eared) things that make their hobby a little easier to do. Groups of swimmers are friendly and relaxed, not kit parades. You absolutely do not need much more kit to swim outdoors than you do in a heated indoor pool. What's more important is knowing how to do it safely and who to go with (more on that here https://www.spectator.co.uk/article/-as-good-as-an-orgasm-how-to-go-wild-swimming-in-winter). But over the past few years, I have learned what's really essential in order to swim safely and happily so here, for what it's worth, is my like-a-dad kit list:

1. Tow float

This is a really essential piece of kit and many outdoor swimming groups and venues won't let you get in the water without one attached around your waist. There are a number of reasons why they're important and the first is that they make you much more visible, both from the shore and to others on the water, particularly boats. They do have a safety function which is sometimes overplayed: they're not lifesaving devices but they can be useful to grab if you feel a bit panicked or out of breath. You shouldn't rely on having one to the extent that you swim further or longer than you know you are capable. Many of them also have a dry bag section where you can stow your keys, your phone, and in some larger models, your clothes. Tie a whistle to your float so you can get attention if you're in difficulty.

2. Swimming costume

Sack off the wetsuit: they're expensive and they're a fiddle to take off, especially in cold weather when every minute fumbling with neoprene is another minute you're cooling down too fast. If you think you need to wear one to stop the shock of the cold water, you've misunderstood how they work: you still get that initial freezing hit as the water floods into the wetsuit. What it then does is stay between the neoprene and your skin, which warms it up, allowing you to swim a little longer. Wetsuits also provide buoyancy, which makes the swimming itself easier, and so they're handy if you're doing a really long swim. Join a local swimming group and you'll soon see that there's a mix of people wearing neoprene and others in 'skins'. Fortunately, 'skins' does not mean naked, but a swimming costume. You'll also spot that most of these swimming costumes are not the fancy ones of fashion magazines, but often quite boring plain ones. So there's no kit pressure here, either.

A bright-coloured swimming cap is useful, too, so that you're more visible in the water. In the winter, you'll benefit from gloves and booties, and plenty of layers to change into, along with a thermos of hot tea to drink. You do not need a DryRobe, though a hooded towel will make it easier to change outside without flashing more skin than you want to. You might want to put your phone in a dry bag in your tow float so you can track your swims.

What's more important is knowing what to do if you find yourself in difficulty, and knowing the body of water that you're swimming in, rather than jumping straight in and realising you can't get out of something that's much colder and deeper than you realised. There's a reason we have the saying 'all the gear and no idea': swimming is much more fun when you're focused on what you're doing, not what you've brought with you.